Before And After
Before zombies ambushed Santa Claus and ate every ounce of his brains, he lived in Tahiti, wore a grass skirt, was beardless, employed only human union members in his toy factories, used horses to pull a gift-filled tractor trailer, and delivered presents to children by entering their homes through the front door.
A team of doctors, led by the renowned Dr. Frankenfutz, arranged for an immediate brain replacement.
The operation was a success. However, as soon as Santa was released from the Frankenfutz Institute for Brain Swaps, he moved to the Arctic, wore only red suits, grew a beard, employed only non-union elves in his factories, used reindeer to pull a gift-filled sleigh, and delivered presents to children by entering their homes through chimneys.
The world’s greatest behavioral scientists, and even Dr. Sigmund Freud, were unable to explain his bizarre behavior.
After years of intense research in the Frankenfutz archives, the mystery of his radical behavioral changes has been solved. Turns out that Santa’s new brain came from the village idiot.
submitted at 2:26am
8 June 2009
Michael's stories have been published by 108 magazines and 30 anthologies.