"Where’s my split from the bank job?" Snuffy yelled, pointing a pistol at Joey’s head.
"Gorgona has it," said Joey
"A gorgeous Martian. She knows how to turn paper into solid gold."
"You’re a mental case," Snuffy yelled, "Gimme my money, or I’ll blow your head off."
"If you do, Gorgona will get mad and tear you in half."
"Where is she?"
"In the bathroom."
Snuffy banged on the bathroom door. "Hey, do you have my money?"
"Yes. I’m turning it into gold right now," Gorgona said. "It'll be finished in a few minutes."
Snuffy kicked the door in.
"How dare you!" she screamed. "Get your hands off me!"
A horrendous POP filled the apartment. Rushing into the bathroom, Joey found Snuffy’s torso in the bathtub and his head in the sink.
"He should have waited a few more minutes," Gorgona said, "until the laxative worked."
submitted at 2:21am
31 May 2009
Michael's stories have been published by 108 magazines and 30 anthologies.