Timing Is Everything

"You’re next, Charlie," said the Angel of Death to the chubby guy on the bridge.

Charlie dashed to the rail and jumped. His body smashed against the rocks below.

Onlookers applauded.

"Your turn, Sarah."

Yelling, "Life stinks!" she jumped headfirst.

Onlookers cheered.

"Look, Boss," said AOD’s ssistant. "Somebody’s standing on top of a girder."

"Hey you!" AOD called though a bullhorn. "Whatcha doing?"

"Jumping."

"What’s your name?"

"Harold Pickle."

AOD checked his daily planner. "Don’t jump. You’re scheduled for tomorrow."

"Does it matter?"

"Yep. Affects the entire cosmos. Go home. Come back tomorrow."

"But I can’t stand my wife’s constant bitching."

"Get a room. Find a nice streetwalker. Enjoy yourself. It’s your last full day on Earth."

"OK. I’m coming down."

Just then, Harold’s wife jumped out of a cab. She bitched at him so unmercifully, he scrambled back up the girder and jumped.

The entire cosmos collapsed into nothingness.

Story by:

Michael A. Kechula

submitted at 4:06pm

6 May 2009

Michael's stories have been published by 107 magazines and 30 anthologies.